October 17, 2020
Back in 1997, while at a Flying J truck stop in Black River Falls Wisconsin U.S.A., I experienced the real beginning of my spiritual awakening. It was an agonizing experience; my 3rd eye pried itself open. This sometimes happens to individuals who experience extreme emotional trauma. In previous articles, I have described the abuse that took place throughout the first two and a half decades of my life.
The events of 1991-2 had left me extraordinarily vulnerable. The following five years had left me in a depressive hole so deep, dark, and utterly lifeless, that by that snowy night in Wisconsin, my sense of self-worth had collapsed in to a place where I had absolutely no expectations of anything or anyone. As a child, I had thought that I had known what loneliness and depression had felt like, as it turned out, I had not even scratched the surface of the abyss.
At that time my grail quest was pretty well not a quest at all, it, as well as everything else in my life, had stalled. At the time, I worked with a couple of people who introduced me to a couple of different ideas, one, that every person we encounter we are supposed to. And two, Machu Picchu in Peru, in this case, the fella who talked about it had grown up in a village not far from there. In both cases, I ignored their importance, as I could not dredge up the metal energy to explore these things. However, quietly in the background, my 3rd eye was open, but I had no concept as to what it was trying to show me.
As time progressed, slowly but surely, under the sure guidance of my not understood 3rd eye, things began to improve. It was finding secure logical evidence, and following that trail through all the baffling
twists and turns and, seeming dead ends of my grail quest that brought hope. Initially I was dismayed and immensely disappointed that the grail seemed to have no structure, no priests, and no way of “joining”. As I continued my study of the grail, over time it became glaringly obvious that in its wisdom, there was no need of any of that. For many years, I concentrated mainly on its scientific history, learning about the Annunaki, the chalice being Marys’ or any other women’s womb, and unlearning Jesus’s contrived life.
For quite some time I kind of plateaued there, then, the words Mystery schools began to appear everywhere. At roughly the same time, the number 26 began to appear reasonably often as well. The number brought up uncomfortable associations, and I tried hard to not understand them. This then was a period of personal upheaval, my life partner and business associate, was a black out alcoholic, my health was in a period of decline, namely my eyesight; cataracts. During the preceding 15 years, I had become aware of the possibility of there being far more to life than that which we see with our limited human faculties. I had been introduced to an author by the name of James Redfield; you may know him by his descriptive pseudo handbook, The Celestine Prophecy. In this work, he describes how through human interaction, we increase vibratory frequencies and are able to see one and the others auras. An ability that I was very skeptical about.
That being said, I was aware of the possibility from having watched a 1970s T.V. show called Science International, where in a segment from one episode, they had shown pictures of a person’s aura. From then, I had believed that a person’s aura could only be seen by camera. It was during my own cataract surgery, that I was given proof positive, of there being an entire universe of energies that we as humans are entirely unaware of. As the lens was lifted off of each of my eyes, the raw data that I became aware
Of was absolutely mind blowing. I have since learned how to see auras at will. Yeah, now I know more about you than you do. That period of upheaval was good for me. I left the alcoholic, reunited with the nanny, learned what the number 26 was all about, and, learned that I am an empath. I too began to study the mystery schools in earnest. Discovering Hermetics allowed for a completely new viewpoint on spiritualism, answering why and what Jesus Christ really meant when he talks about love. Upon making that connection, and learning what really happened between the nanny and myself all those many years ago, created a vast space inside me where, love, joy, and appreciation for self grows exponentially daily, allowing this to take place, a
critically needed reunification with my sacred feminine. As we go forward on our grail quest, we will talk in depth about this. The most astounding discovery during the last three years has been this though, finding out that I am an empath, I had no idea that there was such a thing. If someone had said the word empath to me, I would have thought of the T.V. show Star Trek The Next Generation and the character Counselor Deanna Troi. As we go forward, we will talk in depth about the classifications of an empath, his/her strength and weaknesses, and how we are created. Making this discovery about myself sure has answered a host of questions that I never expected to understand.